How do you *approach* a difficult discussion without letting emotions derail the conversation?
Months ago, a colleague scheduled a last-minute meeting to discuss a topic she has been challenged with for the past year. Frankly, I dreaded the conversation as she had been very reluctant to shift her perspective, and make a change.
She came to the meeting with full-on emotions and in a pure rage, and needless to say, the rest of the discussion did not go well. I listened and created space for her to vent, but the conversation went nowhere.
I managed to remain calm, however, this particular discussion took a lot out of me. I was on the precipice of being triggered.
As you *anticipate* conflict, how can you stay calm, show empathy, and restore harmony – or at the very least, de-escalate things?
· Be intentional, going into the conversation – What goals are you hoping to achieve? What do you want to take away from it? Set clear boundaries and prioritize what outcomes you’re shooting for.
· Make one of those goals be about staying calm – Instead of reacting, how will you respond?
· Respond without jumping to assumptions by asking questions – What is your intention for this discussion? Can you clarify what you mean by that?
Anticipating and addressing the stress before the conflict starts can go a long ways.
How do you approach stressful situations? What will you do differently?
Related Resources:
How To Handle Difficult Conversations At Work (Forbes)
How to Quickly Calm Down When You Get Triggered at Work (Harvard Business Review)
How to Have Difficult Conversations at Work: 5 Key Steps (BetterUp)
